Sunday, February 1, 2009

Going Back

As I sit here, way too late to have many thoughts that are of any use at such a late hour. David is playing a song on his laptop that brought me back a few years to when we were dating. He was living in Seattle, I in Winlock. He burned me a CD that I listened to constantly, partly because I liked the music, mostly because I was totally in love with the boy who gave me the music. A small smile made its way to my face. It brought me back to the days we spend our last waking moments of the day talking on the phone, dreaming of the day that we would be together, forever. His voice would make me fall even more in love, neither of us would want to hang up. We were hopelessly in love and no one could convince us of anything else. It's funny how a simple song can bring your mind and thoughts back to a different time.

Tonight as I sat bored during the 2nd quarter of the Superbowl game, my sleepy eyes and wondering mind woke up as the announcer said "speedy". I didn't catch the whole sentence, nor was I really paying attention as I laid on the floor in a blanket, but the minute I heard "speedy" my mind became alert again. I was brought back to a short moment of my life that I had with my boys. This is how it will be. Out of nowhere, words, images, thoughts, songs, ect. they will evoke emotion and memories. I will carry them with me always, more than I realized. I think it may be too late to make anything more of this realization. I'm tired and should rest this tired little head on her pillow and call it a day. It was a good one. I love you Quintin and Speedy, I always will.

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